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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29039502">Why keep going?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Tragedy, Gen, Murder-Suicide, POV Second Person, Suicidal Thoughts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 10:42:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>786</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29039502</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>You're name is Karl Jacob's. You are a streamer and Youtuber. You are in love with your best friend Sapnap but... he's dead. And you killed him.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Karl Jacobs/Sapnap</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Why keep going?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This was made by an AI all I did was touch up some parts and make it decent. It makes no sense still but it hurt my soul-</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You're name is Karl Jacob's. You are a streamer and Youtuber. You are in love with your best friend Sapnap but... he's dead. And you killed him.</p><p>You sit in silence, as the night turns into day. You decide to visit Sapnap and drive to his house. You sit in your car and wait. You think about that day. About how you killed Sapnap. "I didn't kill Sapnap!" But you did!  You can't believe it. You close your eyes and a small tear falls down. "How could I have done such a thing? I loved Sapnap, I didn't want him to die!"</p><p>You decide to drive to the beach you and Sapnap loved. You pull into a parking spot and turn off the car and sit in silence for a moment looking out at the ocean. You walk out of the car and ask "Sapnap, do you love me?" He appears out of thin air and He turns to you and smiles.<br/>
"Of course I do"<br/>
He pauses and then says "Want to sit with me?" You stare out at the endless blue waves in silence for a minute. You nod and walk to Sapnap and sit down along the edge of the beach. You ask "Sapnap do you forgive me for killing you?"</p><p>He smiles. "Of course" He pauses and then says "Perhaps you should ask yourself that question."<br/>
You think for a moment and realize he's right. You stare out at the dark oceans. You feel a numb, empty emptiness inside. You say "Sapnap I'll see you soon" </p><p>"I'll be waiting"<br/>
He smiles at you.</p><p>You lean forward and gaze out over the endless skies. Your heart beating, you gaze out over the endless ocean. You wait then you take a deep breath and leap forward off the end of the cliff. You fall and fall until you feel A surge of water rushing up, filling your mouth. You hold your mouth shut and struggle underwater to stay afloat. You feel the water filling up your lungs until you see nothing. </p><p>.<br/>
.<br/>
.</p><p>You wake up and find yourself in bed. You look at your phone and see that you have a message from "Yourself" It reads: You had a nightmare, but you're okay now.<br/>
You cry.<br/>
You cry about Sapnap.<br/>
You cry for hours.</p><p>It's morning, but the sun is already high, and you have to get up. You sit in bed staring at your phone, unable to stop the tears from flowing.<br/>
You sob for an eternity.<br/>
You sob for another eternity.<br/>
You sob for a few more eternities.<br/>
You sob until your chest feels tight and painful, and your eyes are dry and bleeding. </p><p>You stare at your phone a moment more and then decide to get up finally. You go to the bathroom and take a cold shower. You decide to talk to your best friend Quackity for a bit. You drive to his work and walk in.<br/>
"Oh hey man" Quackity waves to you and comes out from behind the counter.<br/>
You respond "Hey Quackity"</p><p>He smiles and says "Want some coffee?"</p><p>"Sure, thanks" You drink coffee and watch the cars drive by for a few moments. You say "Quackity, I'm going to miss you"<br/>
Quackity looks over "I'll miss you too, you'll be alright."<br/>
you say "Thank you."<br/>
"You're welcome." He walks back around the counter and goes about his work. You sit and drink your coffee for a bit.</p><p> </p><p>It hits 7 pm and it's time. You say goodbye to Quackity as you walk to your car. You drive to the beach. You turn on the radio and tune in 95.3 The Buzz. By the time you get onto the 101, you're in the far left lane, driving at a pretty fast speed. </p><p>You make it to the beach and get out of your car.<br/>
You sit down on the same cliff you were at earlier in your dream and stare out at the vastness of the ocean.<br/>
The sun is setting, and as the sky deepens, the lights of the city come on. You ask "Sapnap are you here?" You think about your dream, and the endless amount of pain and tears you felt in it. You stare out at the endless ocean. You get up and walk over to the cliff. You feel as if you're walking on air, and the ground is gently moving under your feet. You walk out to the edge of the cliff, before looking down. "Sapnap I miss you" Your voice trembles as you say the words, and your eyes start to burn.</p><p>"Sapnap I miss you, I don't want to be here without you."</p><p>You close your eyes</p><p> and jump.</p>
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